Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Who are you Miss Vickie Barber-Ellis?

I was asked this question recently and thought well, that's my sign that it's finally time I get that blog page going!  So, what was the answer?

Well, I'm a friend, lover, mother, grandmother and so much more...yes, so.much.more.

I'm just me, being the best me that I can be.  I'm "different" to some people, quite ordinary to others.  I have one of those unique personalities that lends itself to people either loving me, or well...not.  And, I'm okay with that.

You see, I understand the importance of being yourself.  There were a few (thank heaven only a few) of my 50 (and a little plus) years where my life was about being what others wanted me to be, or what I perceived they wanted me to be, instead of simply being myself.  How utterly exhausting!  And, how utterly ridiculous!   Let me tell you some of what I learned...

  1. I cannot make anyone happy.  Only they can make themselves happy.  Only you can make you happy.  Only I can make me happy.  I cannot make anyone, including myself, happy by being something or someone else other than what and who I am.
  2. I decide.  This was one of the most powerful things I learned.  Those two simple words that can be the most powerful words in your daily language (spoken and unspoken).  I decide that I will be happy.  I decide that I won't be taken advantage of.  I decide that it's okay not to be like everyone else.  And, I decide its okay not to be liked by everyone else.
  3. I can.  I can love. I can be loved. I can forgive. I can do it.
  4. I always have choices.  Notice I didn't say 'a' choice?  I have choices.  There is never a time where you do not have multiple choices.  Ever.  You and your ego may think that is the case, but it never is.  There are just some choices that are not as good, or as comfortable, or easy as others.  You can choose to do something or not to do something...see?  Choose to accept it, or not. Choose to believe it, or not. Choose to indulge it or not.  I believe whole heartedly that you always have at least two choices. To do or not to do. To be or not to be.  And speaking of be...
  5. Be.  Just be.  Be in love with yourself.  Be in love with life.  Be in the moment, the now.  Be quiet.  Be still.  Taking moments to 'Be' have become more important now than ever before.  We have become a society consumed by doing instead of being.  Not that we shouldn't be doing anything.  Quite the contrary.  Doing is also critically important.  It's just that I have found that taking moments to just "Be" have helped me make better decisions, better choices.  These moments have helped me "Be" a better me.  They can help you be Be a better you, too!
Welcome to just a brief glimpse of who I am.  There will be more to come, but in the meantime, may you find Joy...and Love...and may you find Peace in being just who You are.